my health? kaput.
As I have mentioned in previous blogs, I have epilepsy. During progress week I was so relaxed, happy and I took care of myself. When we started, obviously I was going to be stressed and excited about what the new units were going to be and in last week's post I whined about the system and assignments but I never knew that it was going to affect my health so much.
This week was so scary to me, I honestly never had so many fits or auras in a week. Last Friday I had one of the scariest fits I ever experienced, my body was shaking so much and I was alone in my room, no one could help me since I was alone at home. Last weekend on Saturday and Sunday I had an aura but I tried my best to ignore it. In the beginning of this week I was already stressed and tired, my body was giving me signals to relax and not fall in panic mode which is obviously the main factor and cause of my epilepsy.
On Monday I had an aura which I controlled. Then on Tuesday I had a fit at home which drained my energy. I should have stayed home but on Wednesday I still went to school. I arrived around 30 minutes before the lesson at 9.30 a.m and I remember asking my friends to maybe reduce the stress which we cause each other but they took it personally and all were shocked at me and complaining against me and my best friend knew that my fits had increased lately so she was telling me to calm down. I then went to the other side of the studio thanking them for not understanding my current situation and I remember myself crying and then I don't remember a thing...
I then find my best friend in front of me saying my name and holding me from my shoulders and telling me to relax and talk to her I felt my whole body shaking, I was feeling cold and I couldn't control myself. I tried to stop myself from shaking. I also remember a mature student whom is also works for MCAST giving me a Gatorade so maybe I get to my senses.
I then remember telling my best friend to tell the lecturer that I had a fit after she asked me if I wanted to tell her. When she told her the lecturer immediately came by my side and told me to relax and not worry about the lesson since I think I was asking her that I'm sorry I couldn't stay for the lesson. My best friend also asked me if I wanted to call my parents so they pick me up but I told her that I didn't want to hassle them. After 45 minutes I came to my full senses after the lecturer gave my best friend and I permission to go outside to catch some air and so she would take care of me since she is the only one that knows what she has to do and that she had already taken care of me in previous fits.
I was so upset about it and I had a headache all over my skull.
I didn't want to let the stress deteriorate my health and sanity (I may sound like a drama queen but trust me I do not wish anyone to experience what I go through). I decided to take action once again and look after my health. I went to gym again so I burst my stress against the dumbbells and I did all the strength training I have ever done in my life! I am also following a personalized diet plan which the Female Italian bodybuilder wrote for free for me since I am her friend and she also sympathizes with me. She told me to follow the plan for a whole month and keep on training and keep the same doze of the medication for the fits and we will see if I see a difference.
Honestly, I'm so tired with myself that I am going to do anything to get rid of this pain in the arse and maybe have a normal and healthy life.
The lecturer and everyone tell me to set my priorities straight; health comes first and school comes second.